PPOM - I'm Always Right

My final Potentially Problematic Opinion is this: I’m always right.

Boyfriend just shook his head in bemusement, I am sure, because I love telling him I’m always right. But that’s a joke. This is for serious. I’m always right, and so are you, even when we’re wrong.

I touched a little while ago on the weirdness of changing your mind on the big stuff. It can be difficult to let go of previously held notions and realign your thinking with new ones. But while it’s important to admit that you’ve changed your mind on something, it’s also important not to get hung up on feeling guilty that you used to be wrong. And that’s what I mean when I say I’m always right.

Still confused? I’m not surprised, let me elaborate.

Truth is subjective. There are many truths about any one situation, and those truths belong to individual people. Their emotions, experiences, and viewpoints contribute to their individual truths so that you could never accurately say, “this is exactly how it is” about anything, really. Being “right” is the same.

When I have an opinion, I believe it to be right, otherwise I wouldn’t hold it. That’s what a conviction is; something you hold to be true. My experience, my knowledge, my values, they all contribute to this opinion. My values may be different to yours, and my knowledge might be limited, but until I expand my experiences surrounding the issue, I’ll still be right.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying people shouldn’t change their opinions, in fact quite the opposite, I’m just kind of conveying it in a roundabout, slightly weird way. Basically, I think we all secretly think like this, “I’m always right”, we say to ourselves subconsciously. Of course we do, how could we not? If we thought we were wrong about something, we wouldn’t hold the opinion, surely. The point I’m getting at is that when you encounter someone with a different opinion to you, it’s imperative that you remember that they don’t think they are wrong, they think YOU are wrong. It seems obvious when I spell it out like that, but in the heat of the conversation, it can be easy to forget. Keeping this in mind will change every debate or intellectual conversation you ever have.

So as you read mine and other people’s Potentially Problematic Opinions, remember, I’m right. I’m always right. But Jess is right, Tim is right, Noni is right, Alex is right, Britt is right and you are right too. Even when we differ.

I’m always right, just ask me.

 

The irony of my last blog's title is not lost on me, I promise.

August is Potentially Problematic Opinions Month. Led by Alex from Adventures in TV-Land, a bunch of bloggers will tell you about opinions they hold that might piss you off, or make you think, or be so obvious you can’t believe anyone would think them problematic, opening your eyes to a whole world of people who don’t agree with you. This is my description, by the way, and it’s possible that Alex has a completely different one. Ooooooh Potentially Problematic!

What else is happening in PPOM? (will be updated with links as they happen)

Tim joined in PPOM with a great post about unhelpful binaries

Alex blogged about "quality TV" and how she's probs not going to watch Game of Thrones (we'll love her anyway, because she's always right). 

Britt has some really well written opinions about Degrassi because Britt is the best

Jess tells us about giving away books!

PPOM - A Dirty Word

It is my firm opinion that ‘Feminism’ is a dirty word for a reason. It’s not that it’s become obsolete, and so any proponents of it are irritating shrews who don’t know when to stop flogging a dead horse. It’s not that Feminists are crazy, bra-burning man-haters, and it’s not that they ‘take it too far’ and want to run the world and make men irrelevant. In fact, all of those opinions (unfortunately held by too many people) are insidious, clever ways to undermine Feminism.

Feminism challenges the system. And to defend itself, the system has demonised and tarnished Feminism so that no one is quite sure why we ever needed Feminism in the first place. It’s no accident that I heard the word Feminist in a negative light, as an insult, long before anyone ever told me what being a Feminist is actually about. Whether aware of it or not, society doesn’t want young girls (or boys for that matter) to be Feminists, society doesn’t want people to challenge it, or tell it it’s wrong, or change it. Society wants to stay the way it’s always been thank you very much, and those who challenge it will be crushed with the mighty fist of injustice.

I’ve not used the word ‘sexism’ yet. Why is that? There is no doubt in my mind that the world is filled with sexism, but many would not agree. When we hear the word ‘sexism’ we tend to think of a time gone by, when women were lesser by law, when the men worked and the women raised children, when a man could beat his wife and be protected by law and by society, when women had to leave work if they got married, where sexual harassment and assault were “normal” parts of a workplace. For the purposes of this rant, I’m not going to get into the fact that all of this still happens. But people who argue against Feminism will say that we succeeded against all of this with laws and policy changes many years ago. But I disagree, I think it’s just become more subtle. When Feminism was fighting against blatant sexism, it was easier to point to acts and condemn them. Look, this firm has no women in it; look, this woman was beaten; look, this law is discriminatory. Feminists from that era will almost certainly disagree with me, and that’s fine, but I feel like sexism is so much more insidious nowadays, and that makes Feminism, and what it even is, even harder to understand.

Sexism manifests itself in music, in advertising, on our screens and in our books. All it takes is a quick skim of @everydaysexism on twitter to convince you that it’s still happening IRL as well. But you tell someone you’re a Feminist and you’re bound to get questions. “But why?” “Why not call yourself an equalist?” “Isn’t Feminism unnecessary now?” You have to be on the defence straight away. It should be as normal as anything. Of course we all support women’s rights. Of course we want to eliminate sexism. But it’s not. Feminism is a dirty word. Right now I think it’s dirtier than ever. And why is that? Because we still live in a patriarchal society. Because sexism is still the norm, because there are still gender roles we are afraid to change, because a society without sexism confuses and scares us. We still tell our little girls they should be pretty above all else. We still tell our little boys not to cry. We still expect boys will be better at maths and sport, we still think women who don’t want babies are weird. And Feminism challenges all of that.

If you think Feminism is a dirty word, think about why. Think about the society you live in. How is Feminism portrayed in the media? Who controls how you perceive sexism and equality? Is it the people who benefit from a patriarchal society (and I’m not just talking about men here, for the record)? Is it newspapers and Hollywood and government? Yeah, I’m bordering on a conspiracy theory here, but I think it’s legit. The system works. The system knows how to stifle challengers.

The system wants you to hate Feminism.

 

Trying to find the original source for this, if you know it, pls tell me.

August is Potentially Problematic Opinions Month. Led by Alex from Adventures in TV-Land, a bunch of bloggers will tell you about opinions they hold that might piss you off, or make you think, or be so obvious you can’t believe anyone would think them problematic, opening your eyes to a whole world of people who don’t agree with you. This is my description, by the way, and it’s possible that Alex has a completely different one. Ooooooh Potentially Problematic!

I feel like I have been sharing a lot of my opinions lately. So in some ways, thinking up opinions to blog about has been a bit tricky. And in other ways, this should be the easiest thing in the world for me, she who cannot stop telling everyone her opinions. Today’s rant kind of makes me sound like a conspiracy theorist, though, so that’s new. 

What else is happening in PPOM? (will be updated with links as they happen)

Alexandra Neill has written about how her views on feminism have changed over the last year, and how no one should be made to feel like a "bad feminist".

Britt Aylen has written about how she's a feminist who is writing a screenplay that doesn't pass the Bechdel Test.

Jessica Broadbent has written about classic books that actually aren't worth reading. 

Want to get involved? Click here. 

If you're feeling a bit overwhelmed by opinions, next week I'm going to write about crumpets... 

Feeling better about things.

Astute readers will note that I took a break last Sunday. It was my birthday (almost) and I was off having adventures. If you don’t follow me on Facebook you’re missing out on really important information like this, and also amusing screen shots of the things people have googled to find Hum Drum Plum so I honestly don’t know what you’re thinking of on that front.

This week I want to blog about serious things. But I’m not gonna. My brain is filled with a hundred opinions about asylum seekers and politics, atheism and education, feminism and media… but those opinions are starting to take their toll. I feel exhausted sometimes by the weight of my own thoughts and occasionally you’ve just got to have a bit of fun, sometimes you have to turn off your brain (and step away from the computer) and let the shit of the world pass you by for a few hours.

So here’s a list of things that will make you feel better about any given topic.

1.     Step 1. Cut up a banana, step 2. Stab a banana piece with a fork, step 3. Dip piece into nutella jar, step 4. Omnomnom, step 5. Nirvana.

2.     Play board games (not Monopoly) with trusted loved ones. If anyone starts getting aggressively competitive, make them sit on a tiny chair in the corner until they’ve calmed down.

This is an actual photo of me actually playing board games with my actual siblings.
It was a lot more exciting than we are making it look.

3.     Watch The Emperor’s New Groove.

4.     Use safe mode on youtube, it hides all the comments. 

5.     Buy a packet of pink Hubba Bubba. Chew each piece until it *just* loses its flavour. Spit it out. Repeat. This, for me, is a personal vendetta against adults from my childhood, who made me get my money’s worth on every last piece of quickly-flavourless bubblegum. 

6.     Use the hashtag “cleaneating” on your instagram photos of cheese, chocolate and hot chips. 

7.     Make tea in a teapot. You’re fucking worth it.

8.     Hide all the people on your facebook feed who are wrong all the time.

9.  Go for a long drive in the countryside. Perhaps you have a friend who lives three hours away and would gladly welcome you for a weekend in a small town first founded in the 1840s and known for its rich grain and cotton industries… 

10. Make a playlist of your favourite up-tempo songs. This is not a workout playlist. No, it is not a housework playlist. These are not the songs you’ll listen to on the way to work. This is your dance mix. You will dance to this list when you’re home alone. You will crank it loud, you will sing along, you will jump up and touch the ceiling, and spin around in your socks. No one is watching, and if they were, they’d want to join in.

11. Buy someone a gift for no reason at all.

12. Buy yourself a gift for any reason you can think of. 

13. If you’re the kind of person who is into this sort of thing, do your hair and makeup real special on a day you will see no other living soul. Be glamorous for the only person whose opinion matters… you.

14. Put clean sheets on your bed and go to bed early with a book. This is one of the best cures for grumpiness in the whole world. Don’t knock it til you’ve tried it.

15.  Make something. Build it out of lego, or playdough or sand. Bake a cake if you want, or write something down. There is a whole world of tiny achievements you can create yourself. Today I picked some snow peas I grew myself and I feel like the Queen of the world.

16. Let people be wrong on the internet. They’ll always be wrong, don’t let them make you mad too.

17. When the banana is all gone, keep eating the nutella with the fork. You’re a grown human, do what you want man.

18. Write a list of things you’ve rarely or never done. And then take your own advice.

19. Tell someone you love them. 

It's a Bird! It's a Plane! It's an Overanalysis of Man of Steel!

So today’s blog is about Man of Steel. It doesn’t contain spoilers, as such, but if you haven’t seen it and you want to go in without my opinions bouncing around your head, maybe save reading this for later. Alternatively, my opinions are pretty good, so definitely take that into consideration.

The problem with overanalysing this film is that I decided to do so ten minutes into it, and also I’ve only seen it once. When I did Mulan last week, I stopped and started it, took screenshots, and wrote notes. Not having that luxury yesterday, I mostly spent the film leaning over to Boyfriend and making “witty” comments in an attempt to remember them. I’m sure this really enhanced his viewing experience. It certainly improved mine.

Here’s what you need to know about Man of Steel: it’s not a Superman movie. “Oh but Lizzy!” you cry, “I’ve seen the trailer, I’ve seen the poster, it has a dude in blue and red punching the air while flying. He has a cape. I know what is what.” Yeah, well, sure it has Superman themes and ideas but because the film focuses on Superman’s origin story, it’s actually an alien movie. More than that, it’s an alien invasion movie. . It follows a bunch of the same tropes as other alien invasion films, the first act of the movie is set on Krypton and there’s a bunch of dudes in suits talking about the importance of protecting earth. I love alien movies that are set in America. They always vaguely reference how other countries react (usually in front of well-known landmarks), but it still comes down to the CIA or FBI to sort that shit out.

...and this guy

The aliens look exactly like humans, except they have cooler clothes. Kryptonians are big on skintight suits and armour, and after seeing the film; I must admit I’m a convert. What a badass way to dress. We should all incorporate a little more armour into our wardrobes. But I’m less inclined to adopt their architecture… the major theme of which is genitalia. I know I’m not alone in thinking this because Boyfriend definitely nodded at one point when I whispered “are they living in a giant penis?” And when a bunch of Kryptonians got incarcerated in sarcophagi-like things, Boyfriend said, “You’ve been sentenced to dildo prison, sorry”. Given that a large part of the film is about how babies are made, and (SPOILERS, select to read) how great it would be to make them on the ashes of earth, the phalluses are more than a little off putting.

                                                                             

Now, I must come clean here and say that my Superman knowledge is limited. In fact, all of it comes from the TV show Smallville (please, don’t judge me). Perhaps I’m not the best person for this job, but hey, I’m the boss at Hum Drum Plum and I just seemed like I had a good head on my shoulders, I gave me a shot despite my initial misgivings. My Smallville watching did prep me for noticing the little references to the Superman source material. I particularly enjoyed that lots of trucks and buildings are branded with “LexCorp”. Also Clark lives in a town called Smallville and the nearby city is called Metropolis. Look, I understand the metaphorical nature of these place names but they are kind of awkward in the context of serious film called Man of Steel.

but 100% fine on the show that thought this was a good promo image

Speaking of Metropolis, you know that scene in The Avengers where they fight in New York? It’s a great, action packed ending but I spent most of it being distracted by the overwhelming concern that they were breaking New York. Yeah, well if you felt anything similar while watching that film, be prepared to be weeping for humanity as you watch Man of Steel. Sure, Metropolis is a metaphor for some other city (not New York, as Boyfriend reliably informed me, Gotham is New York), but they BREAK IT INTO A THOUSAND PIECES. I don’t think it’s spoilers to say that the day gets saved (it’s a Superman/alien film after all), but an entire city gets smashed up in order to do it. What are the repercussions of this? The American economy would be significantly effected, hundreds of thousands of people would be refugees, there’d be disease, crime, looting. How could they begin to rebuild? Would Clark Kent be held accountable? Where the hell is the Daily Planet situated now given that the entire city just burnt to the ground? These are the important questions people. I have no doubt there will be a sequel, and I really hope that the writers and directors endeavour to answer my questions in due time. I am confident they read my blog religiously.

What did you think about Man of Steel? Got some shit to say? I am happy to provide you with a platform to do so here in the comments, on facebook and on twitter. Get involved!