12 Things I do that my Teenaged Self would Judge me for

Art.

1.     I wear clothes that are fashionable because they are fashionable. Of course, I also wear really ugly shit, and stuff that I like, that no one else in their right mind would wear, but I do that for me, not to prove a point. The point is I try to look nice on a regular basis, and Teenaged Lizzy would think that was the height of conformity (a bad thing, obviously).

2.     I like stuff because other people are into it. See point 1.

3.     Social Media. Not only do I use it, I LOVE it. Facebook didn’t exist when Teenaged Lizzy was around, but if it had, you can rest assured she would’ve thought it was stupid. Teenaged Lizzy’s boyfriend got a Myspace once, and a few weeks’ later he was no longer her boyfriend. THOSE THINGS WERE NOT RELATED – but someone asked if it was. For real, they thought she’d broken up with him because he joined Myspace. What does that say about Teenaged Lizzy, huh?

4.     I drink alcohol. Older Teenaged Lizzy was well on board with this one, but younger Teenaged Lizzy definitely thought getting drunk was the WORST thing in the ENTIRE world.

5.     I’ve don't hate drugs. WHAT! Teen Lizzy would’ve flat out refused to believe this. Teen Lizzy (Teen Wolf?) was the most irritating person in the entire world about drugs. “Is _____ going to be there? I can’t come to the party then, in case he brings drugs.” TEEN LIZZY IF ­­­_____ BRINGS DRUGS GO TO A DIFFERENT ROOM OR LEAVE DON’T MAKE THE HOST FEEL BAD FOR INVITING THEIR FRIEND OMG.

6.     I respect my parents’ opinions. And I don’t just mean in that “yes mum, whatever you say, mum” kind of way. I mean like, if I have an emotional issue, I call my mum to talk about it because she knows me really well and is wise and clever. And my dad is my go to guy for life decisions like purchasing cars or insurance and what have you. Also cooking. They know things. I proactively seek their opinions on those things.

7.     I don’t believe in God. That’s right, Teen Lizzy, all your holier-than-thou shit is going to look even stupider in a few years when I throw in the towel on the whole Catholic thing and take up full time Atheism.

8.     I exercise and eat well. What up Teen Lizzy, being healthy isn’t lame ok, it’s a good thing that means I don’t get sick all the time like you do.

9.     I forgive people for their mistakes. Teen Lizzy, your love/friendship isn’t so important that people should have to be perfect in order to earn it. If they can say “sorry”, you can say, “no worries”.

10. I eat avocados. They are the fruit of the gods. I don’t know what you were smoking, Teen Lizzy, to think they weren’t delicious (though I think we can all assume it wasn’t drugs).

11. I write funny things, because, Teen Lizzy, you don’t make friends with bad poetry about emotions.

12. I have embraced the Inner Nerd you tried to keep hidden for so long, Teen Lizzy, she’s nice and she has good t-shirts, I wish you’d let her out earlier.

13. I have internet friends because internet friends are good, and guess what Teen Lizzy? YOU’RE A NERD, ACCEPT IT!

Lizzyish reviews: Brisbane Comedy Festival - Skills in Time

Skills in Time – Got Dem Big City Dreams – Turbine Studio

“You are, how you say? Ze Whore of Babylon.”

Pre-Show Appreciation Status: I'd heard good things

There is nothing like going to see something completely new and different. Skills in Time (the people who brought you Jaydos and other bizarities via the magic of youtube) have put together a live show that is at times awkward and strange, but regularly funny. Part nonsensical narrative, part talent show, “Got Dem Big City Dreams” is raw and unexpected, and it has a fucking shark so shut up.

The story follows the boys, Henry (Stone), Greg (Larsen) and Sam (Campbell) as they leave their home in the bush to pursue their dreams of fame/shark murder/cancer cures. Damien Power provides a myriad of characters including all 3 guys’ dads, a hipster/douchebag aquarium owner, and talent show host, Ricky Ray. The jokes are quick, usually completely unexpected, and often foul. There’s a lot of excellent physical comedy, and pretty funny use of AV, showcasing the guys’ video skills.

The show fell down a bit sometimes, feeling a little under-rehearsed and shaky. Plus there were a lot of long pauses between scenes (presumably so that Power could change his hat), which were frankly a bit awkward at times.  I enjoyed it though, it was great to see something out of the ordinary; this certainly isn’t your usual 50 minute stand up routine.

Stand out performances for me were from Sam Campbell and Damien Power, though one of my companions said the stand outs for her were Henry Stone and Damien Power. I guess the point here is that Greg Larsen was also good.

 Skills in Time play at 7:15 until Saturday, and 5:15 on Sunday. Tickets here.

Disclaimer – I should probably tell you that I work for Brisbane Powerhouse. All opinions are my own and not those of my employer.

Disclaimer number two - I have pretty much been waiting my whole life to write a disclaimer like that. 

Lizzyish reviews: Brisbane Comedy Festival - Damien Power and Tripod

Disclaimer – I should probably tell you that I work for Brisbane Powerhouse. All opinions are my own and not those of my employer.

Disclaimer number two - I have pretty much been waiting my whole life to write a disclaimer like that.

I flippin love comedy, all the kinds of comedy, it’s like a drug to me. I also like writing. I also work at a place that hosts a comedy festival.

So, you know… I’m going to write some reviews.

Damien Power – Monkeys in Space – Rooftop Terrace

“And there’s the line!”

Pre-show Appreciation Status: Fan.

I was Damien’s tech last year, so it was really nice to see his show from the front instead of from a small box to the side. And it was a great show too. Funny and punchy right from the start. Damien has a great delivery style; lots of beautifully timed pauses and great throw-away lines that catch you unawares and make you guffaw like a crazy person.

Power (great name) doesn’t hold back and his jokes regularly stray into what some might call dangerous territory. Pedophilia, rape and gratuitous sexual innuendo feature heavily.  Being strongly of the opinion that comedy has no boundaries, I laughed heartily at this kind of material, and most of the audience was there with me for most of the show. There were a few moments where people seemed a bit unsure whether they were allowed to laugh or not. And one great moment (after a pedophilia bit) where the crowd sort of just hummed with uncertainty. Damien made a joke about having found the line and then jumped right back over it anyway. I love a comedian who sticks with their material and goes with it anyway. If they are confident enough about it, it usually works.

Damien is a local guy who is going to go far, he is definitely worth a look in if you can nab a seat. He sold out a smaller room last year and will likely sell out in a much bigger room this year. I look forward to struggling to get a seat to his 2013 show in the Turbine Studio or the Visy.

Damien plays at 8:30pm Friday and Saturday, and at 7pm on Sunday. Tickets here.

 

Tripod – Men of Substance – Powerhouse Theatre

“Dystopia, Datopia, all Datopias.”

Pre-show Appreciation Status: Big Fan.

Tripod’s new show, Men of Substance focuses on their successful 16 years together, and their now maturing tastes in music, women and technology. It was fantastic to see new material from them; their songs are still tight, very funny, and beautifully performed. Tonight was opening night, which may have explained the slightly strange energy at the start. I felt it took about 2 songs to ‘get into it’, but once they were off they were flying.

While the through line of the whole show, that they are now older, wiser and more mature was obviously a device to show off some of their new songs, I couldn’t help but notice how comfortable these guys are - on the stage, with each other, with the crowd. They really know what they’re doing, and their 16 year history with each other makes for a relaxed but well rehearsed show with hilariously candid moments thrown in.

I was laughing loud and long for the entire show. As always, I love musical comedians for doing what seems the impossible: making us laugh, in beautiful 3-part harmony, and still maintaining the joke on the third chorus.

Loved it.

Tripod play at 9pm Friday and Saturday, and at 2:30pm on Sunday. Tickets here.

Next Week: Skills in Time, and anything else I can get along to.

Newcastle Adventure: Day 4 and 5

Newcastle Adventure: Day 4 and 5

RIGHT. Two whole days have flown by again and I haven’t written at length about things that will make you jealous! This must be rectified! ASAP!

Well, Saturday began with breakfast, as all good Saturdays should. Sian and I are good at breakfast; we intend to make a habit of it in Brisbane. Then we headed off to a panel called “Writing Revenge” which was about writers writing to get back at others, and …

Oh my god can I just interrupt to say that the pub downstairs is currently getting Rickrolled? This is the best.

… sorry, return to normal programming. Yeah, writing for revenge was really interesting. There was an author there who had written fiction that included characters based on his real life in not very good lights. And there was someone there who works as an editor on sport biographies who spoke about having to remove really petty, damning stuff by sports stars wanting to settle the score. Loved it.

Then it was on to cupcakes, at a cupcake store Samara would flippin love, and then a catch up with my mentor by the ocean. Kalyan is pretty amazing. She gave me heaps of advice about writing – how to not hate it, how to gain inspiration, places I should sit when I’m writing and things to try. Some of the stuff that really stuck with me includes: “write for yourself, if other people like it – great”, “stories come from people” and “write with rhythm”. We’re going to keep in contact via the internets.

Then I thought I had to volunteer but I didn’t so I went to “NYWF saves Australian TV in an hour”, a panel that had Alex on it, as well as Dom Knight from the Chaser and Lawrence Leung and an awesome guy called Mark Sutton who also hosted the cryptic crossword thing. I don’t know that they necessarily saved Aussie TV, but it was entertaining and an interesting insight into the many different ways someone can go about writing for TV. The place was packed, it was probably the most popular thing I’ve been to here.

Then Alex was on another panel, “Comedy writing: tough crowd” about writing comedy collaboratively. I found this to be one of the most inspiring events I’ve been to here. I really want to take a lot of the stuff I learned at that panel and apply it to making something awesome on my return home. Lots of stuff they said clarified for me why BUGfarce worked so well last year, and also how I could have done it even better. So stay tuned, who knows what might come out of what I learnt there.

Then it was home again home again jiggity jig to get ready for the ball! I decided to walk home, which was a mistake, it’s much further than I thought. But I did get to see the reason why all the streets were suddenly closed: there was a float parade. I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen one before. The floats were a bit odd, and one of them was actually just a ute with an umbrella on it, but still, floats!

I’m pretty proud of my costume, slap-dash as it was, and the hat totally made it!

The ball was a lot of fun. I drank too much and danced a lot – I taught Celeste how to do that foot dance thing we used to do at school? Does anyone remember what I’m talking about? Because I didn’t even realise I remembered until I was slapping my feet against hers. That sounds… stranger than I meant it to.

Also a list was compiled of words that need to be used more regularly in daily life:

The band, Shanghai, was pretty great, and so was the first DJ. For my rant about the second DJ please refer to my tweets at about 2am this morning QLD time.

Oh yes, that’s right. When I got in, drunk and freezing, I remembered to change my phone to an hour later, making it suddenly 2am instead of 1am. I then stayed up for an hour, I’m not sure why or what I was doing (mostly just tweeting about the DJ, I suppose) but there you go.

I got up much earlier than I would have liked thanks to agreeing to volunteer and the wonders of daylight savings. My vollie shift was long, and covered in rain, but good. It was much the same as the other night – go to a venue, dump equipment, realise we’re missing something, go get it, come back, set up, go somewhere else, repeat. My Midnight Beast hoodie bore the brunt of the downpour but by the time I finished I was exhausted and shivering, and still hungover so I had a little lie down back at my room. I’m not really sure why I was surprised that this resulted in me sleeping through the spelling bee, but I was quite surprised indeed! I’m quite upset I missed it, because I’m sure I could have done a great job, maybe even been a finalist, but sometimes the best word of all to spell is nap.

I went and met people that I know and ate a lemon tart in a house looking over the ocean, while watching Australia’s Next Top Model. Then we headed to the Writer Wants a Wife finale. Brilliant stuff. Alex asked me to guest blog about it, so I will link to that when she uploads it. Linkety Link

There was a bit of a sad parting of the ways after that, as some people are leaving in the morning. I shall be quite sad to return to reality myself, really. This has been the best time I’ve had in ages. Equal parts exciting, fun, new, inspiring, challenging, silly and awesome. This has been the year of trying new things, and short of completing the challenge “go skydiving” this is probably going to be the biggest new thing I try all year. I made the decision to come here because I wrote a vaguely emotional tweet about needing to escape my own life, which Alex, someone I’d never met, responded with “www.thisisnotart.org - do it” or something similar. A spontaneous, crazy decision that has turned out better than I could possibly have hoped. I’m definitely coming back next year, without a doubt. Coming with?

Nerdblog 2: Comedy

So I am a stand-up comedy nerd... fangirl... perhaps FIEND would be more accurate.

I'm not sure when this started, certainly not as long ago as my harry potter obsession, in fact probably only within the last 2 years. But it started, and now I am obsessed. I love the quickness of it, I love when it goes wrong, I love that people make whole careers out of making others laugh and being stupid. What a great life. My twitter account is devoted almost entirely to following comedians, and then retweeting them, @ replying them, and then dying with excitement when they reply (it happens more often then you would think).

Just yesterday, Josh Thomas walked into my office. That's not that weird, if you know where I work it makes sense and you would think that I would be cool cucumber about it but no. I got very, very star struck. I'm not even really sure why. I do like him, he's very funny - and I am mega into anti-comedy comedy of which he is a king - but he's not one of my absolute favourites. Also, as I said - it shouldn't have been that surprising to see him. But seriously, my stomach did a little turn and I think I may have blushed. LAME. It's ok dear reader, I didn't do anything stupid. While my housemate did suggest I should have "lovehugged" him, I kept my cool... and then promptly left the office before my cool leapt away from me and started moonwalking to Mmbop by Hanson or something.

Musical comedy is the best. The first time I heard the Axis of Awesome was epiphanic. (I know right? I did call it a nerdblog for a reason). That's when I realised I was super mega into musical comedians. Not only are they funny AND musically talented, but they must also create songs that people find catchy but which won't stop being funny each time you hear it. Think about "On a Boat" - now there is a song that is catchy and funny every time. And yet, if a non-musical comedian tells the same joke more than 2 or 3 times it gets pretty unfunny very quickly.

Sammy J (as in... "and Randy") is another of my all time favourite musical comedians. One time, he spoke to me while he was on stage. Life highlight. Right there.

Speaking of meeting comedians, I met Paul McDermott once... who is my favourite celebrity/personality/comedian person EVER. Like EVER. And you know what? AT THE TIME I WASN'T EVEN THAT INTO HIM. Probably for the best, because if I met him now, I would only embarrass myself (more so even then I'm doing now.. if that's possible). I became a MASSIVE fan after getting into The Sideshow, the cancellation of which is one of the greatest tragedies on Australian TV.

If you are not yet aware of the Doug Anthony All Stars then we probably aren't friends. I don't mean this in a threatening way, just in a "we clearly haven't spoken for more than 3 minutes at a time" kinda way. Because that's about how often I mention them. Seriously, if only to make our next meeting more bearable - youtube them. Amazing. I won't link to them because I've gone link crazy in this post and there's too many excellent videos to choose from. That's one thing you can count on Paul McDermott fans for. He can't BLINK on television without it getting put onto youtube and turned into an animated gif within 12 minutes of it going to air.

So.. anyway. Nerdrant over. If you're not into comedy I'm sorry, not for my blog, for your sadness. I hope you're ok.


L