Showing posts with label feminism. Show all posts
Showing posts with label feminism. Show all posts

Saturday, October 4, 2014

NYWF Daily Wrap-Up - Friday

Photo by Sarah-Jane Edis

Friday begins with a workshop called Writing Sex. Unsurprisingly, it’s about writing sex. I am super nervous about this because I struggle to talk about sex, let alone write it, but it’s actually an incredible experience. People are honest in their discussions and in the writing they share. Reading and writing all these stories makes me realise that sex as an interaction between two humans is a really interesting way to develop plot and character. My infinite thanks to Emma Marie Jones for a brilliant workshop. 

We get lunch and incredible donuts from Dough Heads. My donut has pretzels on it because why not? After stuffing myself with pretzel donut I embark on my self-titled Feminist Friday Arvo. At Why Romance is Here to Stay I learn that I’m a massive snob and maybe I should read some sexy books with hunky man chests on the front cover. At Fucking while Feminist I learn that we still insist on rehashing exactly what feminism is, which to be honest is a bit disappointing given the title of the thing. I’d been really looking forward to a panel about feminist sexual politics or at least some good ol’ fashioned ‘fuck the patriarchy’ to make me feel better about being street harassed on the way there. 

The highlight of my Feminist Friday Arvo is undoubtedly History Chicks. In the United Services Club (nicknamed the Gun Club), surrounded by mounted weapons and photos of (male) soldiers, the panellists talk to a packed room about the women of World War I and II. Niki Aken talks about writing my new favourite show (legit, not just saying), Anzac Girls. She and the other panellists, Bridget Lutherborrow and Davina Bell have all researched and written the untold stories of historical women and their discussion just makes me happy and keen to see what they and other writers will uncover about more women of our past. As I look around, the only woman on the wall, QEII looks down on me and smiles. She was a mechanic in the war, she knows what’s up. 

Fem Fri Arv over, it’s time for trivia. I invite myself onto a now three year old team, the John Triviaoltas and frankly this was a *winning* decision. We won, is what I’m saying. The questions are great, the host, Dave Warneke is fantastic, and I manage to contribute answers beyond the singular Harry Potter question (Ireland won the World Cup but Bulgaria got the snitch). A super fun event all round. 

Basically the entire festival then make the 30 minute trek back to the Royal Exchange for TV-Land and Late Night Readings. We hear from Lawrence Leung and Niki Aken about writing for TV, how to get your ideas out there, the underrated shows they are excited about and various anecdotes about giant props. It’s a good time. The late night readings are crime themed - it’s totally a good idea to end your night with graphic descriptions of true crimes, drug fuelled encounters with hit men   and the story of a detective and his injured goose.

I’m running on far less sleep and far more carbs than I’m used to, but I’m having a wonderful time.


I'll be doing a daily wrap up every day at the National Young Writers' Festival, you can read them here or at www.youngwritersfestival.org where you'll also find a tonne of other cool content. 


Friday, September 26, 2014

Real Life Hermione

Recently Emma Watson gave a speech about how she’s a feminist and everyone else should be too. It was powerful, heartfelt and well-received. But it wasn’t perfect.

I’ve suspected for some time now that Emma Watson is actually Hermione Grainger in real life.

She has all of Hermione’s good traits - she’s brave, incredibly clever, proud and strong. But, like Hermione, she’s also flawed.





When Hermione seeks to liberate house elves, she does so with the best of intentions. As a muggleborn, she has a unique outsider’s perspective to the problem, and refuses to accept a status quo that magic folk don’t even realise is there. She sets up a Society, fiercely defends it when others mock it, and challenges children and adults alike on their beliefs on the matter.

But she doesn’t really consult the house elves.

I think there is no more classic moment in the books then when Hermione stops eating in protest. How will this help? If it were even noticed, it would surely only insult or endanger the elves. By not eating their food you are devaluing their work/lives, and if she had managed a full-on boycott of Hogwarts dinners, she would’ve done them out of a job, their only means for fulfilment and safety. 

Now, it’s incredibly clear that house elves are hard done by, but it’s not a clear cut issue. Culturally, the elves are linked closely with their ‘families’, and we meet a number of them who completely define themselves as their masters’ slaves. So you can’t just walk in and free them. Hermione sees a clear problem, devises a clear solution, and finds that unfortunately, even the magical world isn’t so black and white.


Hermione tries to comfort Winky in the kitchens - art from Pottermore



Similarly, our real life Hermione - Emma Watson - has tried to simplify gender inequality to a clear cut problem with simple solutions. While watching her speech I was impressed and excited, but there were a number of things that niggled. And on further watchings/readings, there are some pretty glaring problems.

Firstly, there is no mention of people who fall outside the gender binary. It’s just men, and women. Women being oppressed and men standing by. The issue is far more complex than that. For one, men are so often the ones doing the oppressing or benefiting from the oppressing. For another, there are plenty of people who don’t fit so neatly into those boxes at all. Feminism *must* include transwomen, it *must* acknowledge the issues faced by genderqueer people, by transmen, by men and women who don’t “look like” men and women. My concern is that the UN and Watson want to make feminism palatable to the mainstream, which I understand, but you can’t exclude people just to make it easier for the oppressors, that’s wrong on so many levels.





Next, there’s a line in the speech about gender inequality hurting men, and how their freedom from gender constructs will also free women. Now I completely agree that men are hurt by the patriarchy every day, but I really don’t like the way it’s implied that men should only care about gender inequality because it hurts them (or women they know and love). Further, I don’t like this stuff about “when (men) are free, things will change for women as a natural consequence”. Like… we should free men from gender inequality and then women can just ride the equality train all the way to the finish? No. It wouldn’t be a natural consequence, and nor should we be expecting it to be. Equality is and always has been a fight, I feel like the implication that it will just all nicely flow now that we know it’s not about man-hating is kind of offensive.

Finally, what is the He for She campaign exactly? It’s men standing up for women, and declaring themselves feminists. Which is great. I am all for that on about 300 levels. But as far as I can gather from the website, He for She is asking men to click a button and then that’s it. So where to from here? Hermione’s made her S.P.E.W badges, she’s signed up Ron and Harry, but now what? I completely agree that gender inequality is a men’s issue, particularly when it comes to sexual and physical harassment, which is perpetrated overwhelmingly by men. That’s a men’s issue if I ever heard one, but is clicking a button and tweeting about it enough? Of course not, there needs to be actual, real changes to attitudes and actions. 

Our real-life Hermione is, as far as I can gather, a really wonderful and excellent human being. I’m glad she’s not fictional, I’m glad she’s brave and kind and clever, and I’m glad she’s standing up for something I believe in. But at this point, I need her to be more than Hermione. I need her to be real, to acknowledge the complexity of this very real problem, and to be seen to be highlighting very real solutions to it. I’d also like to see her pointing out the women who’ve gone before her, who maybe aren’t so 'palatable' to the mainstream, women of colour, women with disabilities, transwomen, women who say things that rile people up. Because as wonderful as a speech about feminism going viral is, Emma Watson’s wasn’t new or ground-breaking and it won’t have particularly long-lasting effects, unless she takes this campaign so much further than a website and a hashtag. 

Hermione Grainger is one of my all-time heroes, and I believe Emma Watson can be one too. But she’s not there yet. 




Want to read more about this topic? These two articles say it way better than I do:

Why I’m Not Really Here For Emma Watson’s Feminism Speech At the U.N. - By Mia McKenzie (Black Girl Dangerous)

Emma Watson Speech Hardly a Game-changer - By Clementine Ford (The Age)

Monday, April 14, 2014

A Blog About Sex

A few housekeeping things: yes, I skipped another week. Soz. I started a post, realised it was boring, deleted the whole thing, had a bit of a sulk and then avoided thinking about it for a week.

On the plus side, Hum Drum Plum recently surpassed 40,000 views, which is NUTS. Even if we accept that a bunch of those are spam views, which we must, I’m pretty chuffed.

Also important, this week I visited the doctor who was my anaesthetist for the procedure I talked about in this post, and he claimed that I was actually talking about The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, not Pixar, but never let the truth get in the way of a good story, I always say.

With that out of the way it’s time to get into this week’s blog post, which is about sex.

Woah, look out. Didn’t see that coming did you?

Without going into any detail at all because this is the whole problem I have a lot of difficulty with talking about sex.

To be clear, it’s not sex that’s the issue; it’s my own experiences I can’t discuss. I am super sex-positive. I am quite happy to talk about sex theoretically, quite happy to be accepting of other people’s sex lives, to not squirm or giggle or judge. But ask me about my own and I’ll probably die of shame. There’s nothing shameful about it, and I’m not actually ashamed, but still, I couldn’t just say, “oh this is a thing I like” or “this is how often I do that thing”. Even in a perfectly respectful and open context.

Here is the only detail I can bring myself to share in this oh-so-public forum:

When I was a teenager, I thought that sex was for boys. This was ok with me, the whole thing seemed a bit icky actually, and so I was quite ok with the idea of being the means to an end for another person. This, it seemed to me, was the logical role of a girl in a boy-girl sexy times scenario. This is obviously a totally fucked up thing to think, and I definitely realised this was not the case pretty early on, but I know that subconsciously, this attitude has been pretty deeply ingrained in me since then.

I also bought into the idea that all dudes want sex all the time. Every adult ever told me to be wary of boys, that they only had “one thing on their mind” at all times and that I couldn’t trust their seemingly innocent motives. This led me to believe for many years that any time someone didn’t want to have sex with me, I was a failure. Coupled with the belief that I was a sex object, not a sexual person, I began to relate ‘rejection’ to my self-worth. If these sex-mad boys didn’t want to have sex with me, didn’t this mean I was an ugly, unsexy, failure of a woman?

Without going into any more detail than this because I might die in a second, this has caused some issues in my life. But in the last few years I’ve been really working on it… sort of like a pet personality project. I’ve been trying to be braver, trying to think more positively about myself and my body, and trying to communicate better.

One of the things that has changed my life is Sexplanations, the sex-ed channel on youtube. If you’ve not watched any of these videos, can I just highly recommend that you do? Even if you you’re super educated on this stuff? Not only have I learnt some things, I’ve also learnt that other people don’t know stuff, that other people have questions, and that lots of things are normal.

But I’m also pissed off that I’m nearly 26 years old, and it’s taken me this long to feel ok with any of this stuff.

It’s very clear to me from my own experiences and from reading about others, that good sex education is completely lacking from most people’s lives. Kids should be taught that consent means hearing a definite yes, not just assuming a yes exists based on the lack of a no. They need to learn how contraception works, and to what extent. They need to be taught that virginity is a meaningless social construct, and that there’s no such thing as a slut. They need to have open and safe forums in which to ask their questions. And they need to not just be shown a whole bunch of photos of chlamydia in the hopes they’ll all abstain in fear.


Photo not relevant. Unless you want to consider the fog a metaphor for confusion and the trees a metaphor for grumpiness.



Sunday, December 8, 2013

Lady Songs

One day you’ll find yourself rocking out to some tunes, it will be just a normal day, maybe you’re on the bus, headphones on, maybe you’re doing the housework and dancing with a broom, or just chilling on your bed with some songs, anyway, whatever it is, one day you’ll be doing it, and it will dawn on you that the last x amount of songs all featured dudes. Like heavily featured dudes. Dude singers, dude instrumentalists, dude lyricists and dude DJs. Startled, you will start to flick through tracks: dude, dude, lady and a dude, lady but only as a sample on a dude’s song, dude, dude, dude.

You will stop then, and ask yourself, where my bitches at?

Or maybe you won’t. Maybe flicking through your songs will produce a more balanced mix, or even a lady heavy mix, I don’t know, maybe you’re better than me. But if you *do* have a moment, like I did earlier this year, do not despair. Because your bitches are right there, waiting for you to listen to their tunes. Despite what our itunes libraries would suggest, there are HEAPS of lady artists out there, good ones, great ones, we just don’t buy their music as often as we buy dude music. And I have got some recommendations for you!

M.I.A - Boyz


You probably remember the song that goes "all I wanna do is *gunshot* *gunshot* *gunshot* and *ca-ching!* and take your money" but M.I.As other songs are also great. It was hard for me to choose one but I ultimately settled on this one because how nice is it to see ladies singing about dudes like this? About ten. Also that film clip yo. 

Peaches - Boys Wanna be her.


No list about lady singers would be complete without Peaches. And this song is winner. 


Beyonce - Girls

Ok so you should probably know that I have a playlist dedicated only to lady singers entitled "Who Run the World?" and yes I do dance like an idiot whenever this song comes on. Sometimes Beyonce says really weird things that kind of make my feminism cringe (my feminism is a person now?) but she is still great, and this song is amazing, and my dancing is a sight to behold.

Bertie Blackman - Mercy Killer


Australian Lady Songs! Yes! Bertie Blackman has an amazing voice and her songs are win. This is probably my favourite though.

Kate Miller-Heidke - Sarah


I've loved KMH for some time, so it's very hard to pick just one of her songs for this list, but this one is kind of amazing and I heard it for the first time live. It's incredibly haunting and bizarre and those drums are AMAZING. Also a true story (almost - happened to a friend of Kate's), which is creepy as hell.

Nicki Minaj - Va Va Voom


I love Nicki Minaj. I mean, sometimes her music is really terrible (like if I ever hear Starships ever again I may have to pierce my own eardrums with sticks) but other times it's really good. This song, is one of those. I think what I love most about Nicki Minaj is that she somehow rides this incredible line between femininity and the "man's game" that is her style of music. Also you should youtube "Nicki Minaj bossing up" for an incredibly candid Minaj-style feminist rant. 


Kimya Dawson - Loose Lips



Kimya Dawson is a perfect human being and this song is also perfect and I know all the words and isn't it WONDERFUL?

Janelle Monae - Q.U.E.E.N.


You know this song right? Everyone should know and love this song. I'm not even going to talk about it, just watch.




If you’re asking yourself why this matters, well I get that, it’s just music right? It’s not the end of the world, why on earth should it matter? Well I don’t think you need to go away and count the ladies and dudes in your playlists and make sure you have perfect ratios or anything. But I believe that the little things we do can make a difference. That difference might just be opening your eyes to gender inequality in a particular industry, or just to new music, which is always nice. The difference can also be bigger than that. More ladies can make more music for our ears if only we actually bought their songs! It starts with us, the consumer, we can be better buyers, better humans, better song listeners. And we can listen to songs about dinosaurs.




Sunday, November 17, 2013

Why I Don't (*gasp*) Shave.

There’s this thing called No ShaveNovember. It’s like Movember, in that it’s for cancer fundraising, but it’s unlike Movember in that it suggests both men and women can participate in it.

Except they can’t, not in the same way, not really.

For men not to shave, it means developing an interesting or amusing, socially acceptable face-statement. For women not to shave, it means grossness.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen men have the piss taken out of them during Movember, we all have. There’s always someone with a wispy excuse for a stash, someone who’s upper lip hair looks like a giant, horrifying hair worm from hell, who cops flack for letting it grow. But it’s all in good fun, isn’t it? And we’ll still put some money in the tin for them because it’s for cancer, and their face hair, while amusing, is totally fine, really.


I haven’t shaved my armpits in months.

I haven’t shaved my legs in years.


Did either of those statements make you freak out? Did either of them change your opinion of me? Why is that?

I get looks now. They are subtle looks, for sure, but they are there. They are always followed by an embarrassed look away, the way someone might react if they were caught staring at someone with a facial deformity. I always smile at people when this happens, to let them know it’s ok.

I am lucky in that my leg hair is blonde, and no one except me or Boyfriend ever get close enough to notice that it is there. My armpit hair is also light, but not blonde; it grows slowly and lightly, but it is this that people stare at. And it is ok with me that they look, because it is unusual. I don’t know any other women with armpit hair like mine. Or else, I’ve never noticed any. And maybe seeing it will make some people question it, I hope, because I think more people should try it.

I’m NOT saying EVERYONE should do it all the time. I am the kind of feminist who thinks women and men should be able to do whatever they like with their bodies. So if you like to have silky smooth legs and armpits then go for your life. But there is another option available to you. And I want people to know all the facts.

First of all, you have been told that it is unhygienic to leave bits of you unshaved. This is a fallacy, and it’s also illogical. Men have hairy armpits and no one calls them unhygienic for it. You’re not about to encourage lice into your pits, I promise. The only difference to my hygiene routine is that I take about 10 extra seconds to scrub my armpits in the shower in the morning. That’s it. I actually experience less sweaty patches on my shirts because there’s hair there now, doing what it’s supposed to do, catching sweat.  Fucking anatomy man, it knows what it’s doing.

Secondly, shaving does not equate “looking after yourself”. While I won’t deny that laziness was a factor in my choice to stop shaving (particularly my legs, that shit is a bitch), I’m not “letting myself go”. In fact, by not shaving my legs, I’ve experienced a revolution in my skin. Gone are the days of horrible dry legs, having to exfoliate all the time, and relying on moisturiser. My legs are no longer crying out in pain all the time because I’ve stopped scraping a horrible old razor across them all the time. It’s just logic. Meanwhile, I no longer have that horrible, blinding sting you get when you spray deo on a newly shaved armpit, and I don’t have to battle with stubble or in-grown hairs. Which is a real win.

Next up, razor companies are the devil. In the early part of the last century, short sleeve and sleeveless dresses became a thing, and a whole new market opened up to the people who’d previously been selling their razors to dudes only. Just think how clever they felt when they thought this up. Hair that no one had ever had out in public was suddenly anissue. And armpit shaving was born. Razor companies cackled to themselves maniacally, started making *pink* razors and sold body shame like it was going out of fashion. Unfortunately, it was not.  

Leg shaving came along during and after World War 2, when silky stockings became a thing. Now, I see the logic here, because it really is quite odd to have hairs sticking through your nice stockings. But which came first? The razor companies or the stocking companies? I might be getting into some bullshit conspiracy theory territory here, but the point is, everything anyone’s ever told us about body hair, that it’s “gross” that it’s “dirty”, “unladylike” or “masculine” has come to us straight from some old-fashioned advertisement. And it never went away. We’ve accepted it, as we’ve accepted painful waxing, plucking, shame and stigma. And frankly, that pisses me off. I don’t like doing things for illogical reasons, particularly reasons that have been created to take my money. I need that money, for food and books and such.

I’m not saying I’ll never shave again. I live in society and society tells us what is normal and nice and fashionable. The last time I shaved my pits was because I wanted to wear a particular dress and have a particular look, but I’ve worn it since without doing so and not felt weird. There may well come a time when I decide to take it up again, or shave my legs for a once off occasion. Or whatever. But for now, I’m enjoying being a little hairier than I once was, I’m enjoying not battling rusty, horrible razors in my tiny shower and I’m enjoying not paying Gilette for the pleasure.

And you know what else? I actually like how it looks.


And, I’m putting out the call. We’re half way through November. Ladies, can you go til the end of the month without shaving? You don’t have to tell me about it, if you don’t want, but I encourage you to try it. And if you’re a dude who’s read this and been “grossed out” by all this talk of hair, I encourage you to shave your pits *and keep them free from stubble and in-grown hairs* til the end of the month as well, and then get back to me.