When I Grow Up

Today's picture brought to you by "Sleepy Lizzy" - too damn tired to Paintbrush

‘You can be anything when you grow up’ is a trap. Western society breeds its kids confident, self-assured and with an arrogant sense of entitlement. We all genuinely believe that we are so awesome that we can do anything. Small children will tell you they want to be firemen, princesses, astronauts, presidents, truck drivers, dancers and superheroes. None of them say, “my whole family is in watchmaking, so I will go into the family business at 16 and make watches my entire life”. They don’t say, “whatever my parents think is the best path” or “doctor or lawyer, they both make lots of money”.

Many cultures aren’t like that. And we as Westerners are conditioned to think it’s bad that parents pressure kids to become one thing, and one thing only. It’s nice to have a choice, isn’t it? Nice to know that you literally could do anything? But it’s just not true. We are pushed down certain paths our whole lives. We slowly move toward careers based on our aptitude and skills, our social background, our education, our parents’ careers and sadly, sometimes our gender. These are subtle influencers, but they are always happening. From primary school’s standardised testing, to high school’s subject choices, university specialisations, TAFE certificates and apprenticeships. Each decision, each test, each year brings you closer and closer to an inevitable choice.

This is a problem for me, because I’ve run out of decisions. There are no more tests, no more subjects to choose. I’ve graduated from a degree I practically fell into, tried my “obvious” career move, not particularly enjoyed it and run away to the country. So what is left to me? I’ll tell you what is left. Mother-flippin writing. And if this post seems at all depressing, let me tell you, the realisation that you have one thing left to do is actually kind of empowering.

I’ve gotten to a point now where I know I’ll never be happy till I try it. And I’ve made the final decision, to do exactly that, to try it. I’m going to do NaNoWriMo this year, and I’m going to be more disciplined. I’m going to stop pretending I’m a writer and actually be one. I’m going to set myself a certain number of hours per week to write in, and I’m going to write in them. I’m going to submit to more things, ask for criticism and try to take it as graciously as I can. I’m going to read as many great books as I can, and I’m going to accept that I’m never going to be a vet.

P.S. I’m at TiNA next weekend! I will almost certainly blog but I don’t know when, I will possibly do a couple of posts, like last time, but maybe slightly more fun and less OHMYGODI’MDOINGSOMANYTHINGSLETMETELLYOUABOUTTHEMINGREATDETAIL